I have closure!!.

After those thieving, half baked shit wizards from ‘Down south’ stole my favorite cabana wear board shorts from my clothes line, I’ve been on a mission to have them replicated.

Thanks to my international shopping adviser Heidi Linnenbank I was able to find the material in the U.S.

After my exacting measurements and design parameters were delivered to the Jean Paul Gaultier approved ‘Haus of Dianne’, my sister Dianne Thomson whipped them up on her Pfaff for me.

Thank you both for righting the wrongs of the world, and believe me, when someone causes me fashion trauma, there is no greater wrong.

*I should post a warning with this. My legs can be seen in the photo. If viewing this in public, try not to let your hands wander inappropriately.