Posts Tagged ‘Retro’

DUMMIES:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

NOTHING LIKE FINDING A POPCORN MAKER, AND FOOT SPA STILL IN THE BOX AT THE OP SHOP, I’VE ALWAYS FOUND THESE TWO APPLIANCES INTERCHANGEABLE ANYWAY:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

ALL THIS USELESS BEAUTY:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

BAT STAND OFF:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

MELTY GUYS THROUGH PLASTIC:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

VAN GUARD:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

IT’S A DEAL:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

HANGING ON THE TELEPHONE:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

PEPITO THE ICE CREAM LOVING DONKEY:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

VOTE 1 MAUDE:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

CREEPY AND KOOKY:

Thursday, October 20th, 2011

Once again another sterling evening was had at the Marrickville Polly’s dance this past Saturday, all it takes is a healthy dose of friends, and attitude being checked at the door, and you’re bound to have a ball (or a toasted sandwich) at Polly’s.

Nowhere else in Sydney can you be dancing to Lady Ga Ga where the music drops, the crowd is hushed, in the zone dancing, and then over the PA comes the call ‘Don’t forget, the toasted sangers are off in ten minutes, and tickets for the bus to the Taxi Club are now for sale .. back to Ga Gag’ i love it!!, it’s so Camp, it’s so community, and it’s so without the beige polish that has decended upon many venues, and locations in our community.

I never feel guilty having a big meal before Polly’s, because i know i’m going to dance it all off later on the dance floor, nowhere else do i dance non stop and never leave the floor, all the stars align, and everything in the universe is great when you get a run of song’s like ‘Born this way’, followed by Diana Ross and ‘Chain reaction’ and then best of all, the slam dunk, ‘Amarillo’!!, i must take this opportunity to state to Polly’s, and all who sail her, if there ‘EVER’ comes a dance, and ‘Amarillo’ is NOT played, you can forget about the ‘Occupy Sydney’ protesters, i’ll have a group of smelly ferals come in and squat on the dance floor, Miss Tammy cannot do without her dose of dervish dancing to ‘Amarillo’.

Lastly, big shout out to everyone who helps to run and organise a night like Pollies, many queens swan in without nary a thought to all the work that must go into putting on an event like this, so Miss Tammy would like to take a moment to acknowledge this work, and effort, to say that it is appreciated more than you’ll ever know, so a polite, deep, and pantiless curtsy to Miss Joan, Miss Caroll and everyone from me.

IT’S TRADE JIM, BUT NOT AS WE KNOW IT (JIM ISN’T SO SURE):

Tuesday, October 18th, 2011

GET A RAT UP YA:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

WE HAVE LIFT OFF:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

MORNING, NOON AND NIGHT:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

WHAT’S THE STORY .. :

Monday, October 17th, 2011

MEANWHILE AFTER THE GUYS SEND THE GIRLS TO GET THE CHOPS THEY FORGOT FOR THE BBQ, AND DOWNING A COUPLE OF HASTILY SCULLED SHERBIES AND GETTING ALL LIQOURED UP, THE GUYS DISCOVER WHAT HAPPENS IN THE PICNIC AREA, STAYS IN THE PICNIC AREA:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

ICE ICE BABY:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

MELBOURNE FRIENDSHIP DRIVE:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

A FAVORITE PHOTO:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

IF I SEE YOU ON THE STREET IN THESE, I WILL SPIT ON THEM, I WILL HACK ON THEM .. NOT EVEN DEXTER FISHPAW WOULD GIVE THESE A STOMP:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

MRS C:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

IN THE BEST PAAAAAAAAAHSIBLE TASTE!:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

CREEPY TRIP RABBIT:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

RED LOFT:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

(NOT SO) SMALL GOODS IN MELBOURNE:

Monday, October 17th, 2011

DISNEY ON PARADE:

Friday, September 2nd, 2011

Wow, a blast from the past, i just found some photo’s from when ‘Disney on parade’ visited Australia in the early 1970’s, this is amazing, as it’s my first memory of an ‘Event’, this was probably the first live show i had been too.

My memory is sketchy, i do remember my mum, and sister Rhonda took myself, and my niece Michelle. I recall driving to the huge park opposite the Hordern Pavillion in Sydney, the big top stood before us, which i later found out came from the Bullens circus (another early memory I have are the Sunday drives, and frequent visits to ‘Bullens animal world’ in Arcacia, amazing times, driving, and walking around lions and tigers).

Like most kids i had a healthy love of Disney, i sat goggle eyed before the tv every afternoon watching the ‘Mouse factory’, i had the cassette from the show which featured ‘Minnies Yoo Hoo’, and i played it until it literally fell to pieces.

The photo above, inside the empty Big Top, is taken from the side we were sitting, tho our tickets were more to the middle, perhaps the beginnings of my lifelong passion, and demand, for nothing but the best seats in the house. The costumes were amazing, and most vividly I remember the Cinderella segment, where at the end the house lights dimmed, and all the dresses lit up with thousands of fairy lights.

Both Michelle and I were lucky enough to be treated with a souvenir program, as i moistened a finger and flipped through the pages, one image stood out amongst all others, and that was a photo of the costume room, and seamstresses doubled over their Pfaff sewing machines, with bobbin after bobbin of cotton thread, i honestly feel that day saw the first fermenting bubbles of the proud Queen i would grow up to be, how could anything other than that have happened, Disney, Fairy lights, Costumes, Pfaffs, my destiny was written in the glitter on the floor.

The morning after the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras party, you exit just across from where ‘Disney on parade’ was staged all those years ago. Leaving the Mardi Gras party, quite often walking like Goofy, and talking like Porky pig (I know Porky isn’t Disney, but in a world of genetic engineering, it’s not such a stretch of the imagination to consider Porky an honorary Disney character) it does strange things to ones mind, and memory, to be cast back so far, to a time and place far more innocent.

After this exposure to ‘Disney on parade’ I became Disney mad, I collected probably hundreds of Disney comics, and much to my regret, swapped them years later, probably for a porn magazine or something. As people do, I changed and kind of grew out of my Disney passion, only to have it reignited years later by my friend Adam.

I had changed an awful lot since I last sat down and squeaked out ‘Minnies Yoo Hoo’, but the basic element of what I loved about Disney, childlike innocence and wonder, was still in me, tho buried deep after a lifetime of experiences to jade one to the core, but it was there, in a little pocket that I found without too much trouble.

In 2005 I got to visit Disneyland, that was, and up to now, still is the happiest time of my life, it was a time of wonder, joy, happiness, achievement, reflection and clarity.

Walking down main street Disneyland I was transported back to being that little kid, in his jarmies, sitting in front of the Rank Arena colour TV watching ‘The Mouse Factory’, and ‘Sunday night Disney’, where the opening titles showed footage of the very place I was now walking as a grown, and fulfilled man. I really did feel innocent, and childlike, free and full of wonder, and I now realize it’s healthy for adults to retain a little childlike wonder.

As I travelled through the park all sorts of people, and nationalities crossed my path, I have a vivid memory of a big biker dude walking along wearing Micky Mouse ears, and he too had a big smile on his face.

With my eyes like saucers I came upon Tinkerbells castle, I walked in and gazed around in open mouthed awe, and then farted, which for me was the perfect marriage of the little Greg, and the Greg of now, someone who has the need to occasionally sully the pure waters, but with a sense of childlike wonder.

Later that evening as I watched Tinkerbell fly out of her castle (I’m sure I saw her give a little cough) fireworks filled the sky, the song ‘When you wish upon a star’ filled the air, and faux snow fell from above, and from my eyes fell tears. I believe at that very moment, the stars aligned as Tinkerbell danced around them, and I was the happiest man on earth.

iPushshitloadsofbuttons:

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

CONTENDER FOR MISS TAMMY’S DREAM ABODE:

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

FANGS:

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

DOLLY DID IT:

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

PFFFT, WHERE’S THE SISSY BAR?:

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

VANITY FUR:

Thursday, November 25th, 2010

In a fashion spread that is so common place these days, but not so much in Marta’s time, she took the opportunity to be dressed and stylised as some of her favorite icons. As is now expected of Marta, it was more ‘Razors’ than ‘Cutting’ edge. Pain, self mutilation and careless regard for society’s mores is all de rigour when Marta steps before the camera, so moisten a finger, and prepare to flip through the pages of Marta’s latest documented fashion gift to us ..


ABOVE PIC: Marta tips the hat, and quite possibley the scales, in this tribute to Courtney Love, Marta spared no comfort zone in her dedication to nailing her inspirations, right down to infusing her Courtney-esque wig with head lice, and hacking out a piece of her septum.


ABOVE PIC: Esther Williams never needed goggles, but that isn’t going to stop Marta interpreting what she believes Esther should have been decked out in. In true Marta fashion she insisted that her goggles carry her prescription, so in a fashionabley aqueous act she could wear these goggles with evening wear, and to the theatre.


ABOVE THREE PICS: Annette Funicello come on down!, it’s ‘Beach blanket bingo’ with Marta as she takes to the waves, and risks getting sand in her crack, and a pelt matted by the drying effects of salt water, all in the name of fashion. Speaking of, Marta can’t help herself, she has to fuck with our minds. In the first of the above three photo’s, you can see in tribute to the material girl Madge, Marta got a pair of pliars, and snapped off one of her top mollars, unlike Madge, who merely used black gum make up, Marta self medicated, and snapped the fucker off in front of the bathroom mirror, why? .. for Fah-Fah-Fashion.


ABOVE PIC: Cool as ice, or warm as an ice pipe?, Catherine Deneuve gets the nod here, the all too obvious beret, the beige Jackie O mid seventies jacket, and Marta’s own diamond earings cut from the nastiest mountain in South Africa. What can i say, cool, icey, aloof, chilly .. textbook French.


ABOVE PIC: The first of two biker girl tributes by Marta, and it’s no one you would think. Here Marta takes on the role of the sexually unsatisfied Olive Butler from the UK tv series ‘On the buses’, played by Anna Karen. Poor Olive was always relegated to the side car of her husbands motorbike, which Marta feels was a euphemism for women everywhere, and there circumstance at the time. Marta recognises, and pays tribute to the subtle work done in breaking down these barriers by making sure no bugs ever stuck in her teeth, and it was okay to wear diamonds, even tho relegated to a submissive roll in a motorbike side car, and most importantly, to suck on the exhaust fumes, and get off your nut as you were forced to be merely a passenger (even tho zoning off into the alpha).


ABOVE PIC: Ethnic chic as Marta travels to the Middle East and plays a role within a role, here Marta is styled after Michelle Phillips in ‘Valentino’, who was herself playing Natacha Rambova in the movie, shades of the famous Dali painting, of a painting, of a painting, of a painting etc. A subtle nod also goes out to Linda McCartney who refused to shave her legs, and was pilloried from pillar to post because of this act of non conformity, Marta (who personifies the the words ‘In your face’) does not fuck around, and for weeks before the photo shoot, mainlined testosterone directly into her temple, to ramp up the pelt on her upper chest as a casual ‘Fuck you!’, and as a nod of solidarity to her more hirsute sisters.


ABOVE PIC: The second in the ‘Biker girl’ series, here Marta don’s a ‘Pleather’ jacket, jumps out of the side car, takes the handlebars, and becomes Shelly Winters in ‘Cleopatra Jones’. Note the totally Sixties face viser, the collagen stung lips, and the Easy Rider profile, no happy accidents here.


ABOVE THREE PICS: Marta does Martha (‘Stewart’ that is). Is it any wonder that Marta chose to pay tribute to a woman who’s life has encopassed crocheting colostomy bag covers, macrame wall hangings (used primarilly for auto erotic asphyixiation), and two years hard labour in an all womens prison?, didn’t think so. Anyone who thinks that the cream canister in the first pic is going to be used for the desert is vastly mistaken, Marta knows that nothing rocks your world like having a hit of nitrous from a cream canister, immediately after hammering a bucket bong.

In the second photo Marta contemplates using the flacid chicken as a hat, of course this predates Lady Ga Ga’s meat dress by a good thirty years, but the dripping bacteria from the gibblets swayed Marta away from this act of poultry fashion terrorism, even Marta draws the line at stomach cramps, and projectile gastric in the name of fashion.

Can we please make mention of the stately outfit?, from the drop flowered diamond earrings, the almost, but not quite, hounds tooth dress, the finely cut blouse with what i can only assume are Saville Row tailored sleeves and buttons, and the double, and wide banded watch. All for the kitchen, and all for glamour.


ABOVE PIC: ‘Jocelyn’ nothing more to be said.


ABOVE PIC: Lauren Bacall all the way, Marta makes a flowing entrance, it’s all about the movement and the moment. The scolloped front flows down, but pulls up short of the pubic region, it’s Marta saying ‘You can have a bit, but not everything’. For her cuffs Marta has hacked the cuff’s off an old pair of bell bottom slacks and grafted them on here for winter covereage, i’ve seen this dress worn in spring without the extended arm length, making this dress a little more interactive. The flower burst diamond (of course) earings are on display for all to ogle, and in true Marta fashion, her stockings, or leggings, are actually made from the stretched foam coverings used to protect stone fruits in supermarkets. Jeannie Little may have made a career out of making dresses from garbage bags, but no one recycles waste into fashion like Marta.


ABOVE PIC: With a look of stoicism, unaffected detachement and a serene calm, Marta holds aloft no mere accsesory, but a symbol of repression everywhere in the GLBTI community, the humble turkey baster. Years before ribbons, fundraisers and awareness campaigns, Marta would appear at openings, red carpet roll outs and celebrity events clutching the baster, and much like how Paris Hilton walks around with her rat dog living in her purse (what dog wouldn’t want to live in a confined space packed with drugs) Marta would use this not so much as an accesory, but as more of a statement, to get people talking, to open up a dialog and break down the walls of misunderstanding. In this one photo Marta pays tribute to not only every downtrodden GLBTI actor and actress, but to every GLBTI person who has been shitlisted, shafted, derailed and denied the fundemental, and basic human rights that so many others enjoy. Cast aside your ribbons, and hold aloft the turkey baster as the international symbol of working around, and defeating archaic beliefs and systems, put in place to stop us progressing and procreating. Thank you for this gift Marta, thank you for giving us a visual to identify with, VIVA LA BASTER, VIVA LA MARTA!!.

This collection is dedicated to Shelly, a fine person who knows her Simian style.

HAIRMOUTH AU GO GO:

Tuesday, August 17th, 2010

Recently ‘RAGE’ played some old episodes of Countdown, and i was cock o’ hoop to see that they played ‘Product of your mind’ by ‘Jimmy and the boys’, if for no other reason than it features Joylene Hairmouth’s greatest ever filmed performance.

This is the Citizen Kane of Joylene, a veritable Hairmouth cinema verite.

I love this clip soooo fucking much, Joylene is treating the keyboard with such contemp, but it’s trained contemp, she’s going at it like Shirley in the Partridge family, after Ruben Kinkade accidently drugged her, instead of Danny.

Think Marta Hari from Lancelot Linc’s Evolution Revolution .. that style of playing, where the hands look like they are frantically trying to fan someone back into conciousness after a bad, or really good pill.

We all know what was done to those poor bastard monkey’s to get them ramped up and hopping about, simian electro play was the order of the day, and Joylene looks, and performs in this clip like she’s had a car battery freshly clipped to her nipples.

To this very day, each time i enter the Opera House’s grand hall i have a knot in my stomach, knowing that Dame Joan Sutherland and Olivia Newton John opened that place, when all along the first person on the stage should have been the real La Stupenda Joylene.

Let me tell you, i bet Joylene would have had a better camel toe than Olivia did in her black lycra pants in Grease (another starring roll Joylene was jyped out of).

I do my bit, every morning i lay a fresh lilly before the framed photo i have in my lounge room, that was taken last year of Joylene, myself and my filthy bitch bestie ‘Beryl’.

Both Beryl and i agree that besides the night we came across a leather clad, and Rose free Willie Porteous at Sleaze ball, in the downstairs shitters in the Hordern Pavillion, our evening with Joylene was the pinacle of our very existence.

Below are some screen captures i took from the clip. I’ve posted some before, but they were from a lame ass Youtube clip, these are better quality, and it’s all about preserving art in the best possible quality .. and taste.

WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT:

Wednesday, February 18th, 2009

February 12th 2009, a date circled most enthusiastically in my diary, for this was the day when i finally had the honour of paying homage to the most influential lady to ever cross the entertainment, and political stages of Australia. Forget your Chelsea Brown’s and Bronwyn Bishops, none of them hold a melting candle to Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth.

Joylene was starring in a show at the factory theatre ‘Betcha thought i was dead .. ‘ and so it was that the collective Miss’s Tammy, Stephanie, Beryl and Viv went along with butterflies sniffing amyl in our bellies, such was the level of our excitement.

I cant go into a review of the show, it was one of those ‘You just have to see it to believe it’ situations, i went merely excited to be seeing Joylene for the first time but we left having seen an amazingly well written, and sharp piece of theatre.

At the end of the show Joylene left the stage, i thought alas my chance of kneeling before her to pay my respects had flown out the window, but upon leaving the theatre and entering the foyer Miss Stephanie squealed ‘She’s here!’ and so we hung back while Joylene conversed with some friends of hers, i was amazed to realize that for almost the first time in my life i was nervous to be meeting a star!.

I’ve met more famous people than Beryl has had interventions, I’ve done all the biggies, including Diana and Paul McCartney, but Joylene was rooted a little deeper in my belly.

When i thought about it i realised that Joylene was someone who struck a very deep, and early chord with me .. but not an obvious one, Diana yeah for the glam, and Paul for the music, but Joylene went deeper, to a darker more hidden place.

Then it all came together for me while waiting to meet her, when i used to watch Joylene on tv when i was a kid, she was a drag terrorist, she was doing things that no one would dare do in 1970’s Australia, a disemboweling drag queen appearing on the daytime blue rinse Mike Walsh show?, a self immolating drag queen running for the Australian senate?, my little fourteen year old eyes were watching all this, and tho I’ve never had the urge to don an osti frock, i was desperate to be however, and whatever i was meant to be.

I felt crushed, compressed and moulded into what i was supposed to be, or expected to be, but through watching Joylene all those years, it must have sunk in deep, that you can step outside the square, you can do whatever you want to do (sometimes at a high cost, but surely it’s a higher cost to not do that) it is possible to not fit the mold.

I now know that that is what my little eyes were taking in.

When Joylene finished talking to her friends, i went over and introduced myself, and instantly i felt a warmth, a sense of gratitude to her i could not convey. It was a joy for me to see the sense of wonder in Beryl’s eyes as she realised she was in the presence of greatness, she was standing before Australia’s very own Drag terrorist, our very own Filth Queen if you will, and no matter how many rats have lived in Beryl’s drag wigs, she could never hold a torch to Joylenes monolithic, iconic beehive blade (Which should be in the Powerhouse museum along with Joylene’s other fashions, i mean if they can have an exhibition of Diana’s dresses and artifacts surely one dedicated to Joylene cant be far away).

Joylene was so very gracious, and entertained us for several minutes, and accommodated photo’s and autograph’s, we bid our thanks and farewell’s, after fullfilling our desire, to prone ourselves, to prostrate ourselves before her size 12 court heels, in utter gratitude, and thanks.

It was rather telling when we were outside, Stephanie commented ‘Isn’t it lovely when you meet someone you love and admire, and they aren’t an arsehole’.

Click here for my previous Joylene post.

Once again Joylene, thank you from the heart of my bottom.

Eric Oldfield.

Saturday, November 1st, 2008

a

b

c

d

e

My first crush.

FROM THE FILES OF I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN I WAS GAY WHEN:

Friday, October 31st, 2008

During the big clean out of 2008 I found this photo in an old issue of TV Week magazine of Eric Oldfield, an Aussie actor, who appeared most memorably in ‘The Young Doctors’. My lust for Eric Oldfield goes back much, much further than that. In about 1973 Eric was the centerfold in Cleo magazine, not full frontal, but you saw enough. I remember seeing this, and I really think from that moment on the deal was sealed. I was fascinated by these photo’s, I was drawn to them like a sociopath to a McDonalds drive thru speaker. To this day I can see the pictures so clearly in my minds eye, obviously I didn’t know what it was back then when I was eight years old. It’s so funny, a friend just the other night saw this magazine photo I had laying around my house, he’s about the same age as me, and he gasped when he saw it. He went on to tell me how he had seen the Cleo centrefold and had been drawn to it as well. I mentioned this to my friend Matt in Melbourne, he too fessed up that Eric Oldfield in Cleo had had the same effect on him, and that he too could recall each detail of the photo’s. Anyone that can find me a copy of that issue of Cleo will be rewarded handsomely, I’d LOVE to scan it up and post it here.

Family ties.

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2007

It’s a total pisser to me that huge amount of my family now lives in Queensland, but thankfully we have all stayed close. I was flicking through a photo album the other day, and found this photo of Adam and i, taken with my niece Michelle last year. The photo next to it showed me with my sister, as well as Michelle and her two sisters Kylie and Danielle in the surf at Mollymook, when we were just little kids. Whats with all this reflection lately with me?, pulling my old notice board to pieces, finding old photographs, throwing out a heap of old stuff i once clung to, am i De-nesting?.

PIC 1: I was lucky enough to have a lot of my nieces and nephews born soon after me so the bonus is that they are all more like brothers and sisters to me than nieces and nephews, i was only seven when my third niece was born!

PIC 2: Me, my big sister, and three nieces in the surf at Mollymook. Every summer the whole family, inc aunts, uncles, cousins etc would decend, en masse to Burill Lake on the south coast. Unless it was pissing down with rain, we would spend pretty much every day at the beach, not just one, but a whole array of beaches. I’m not exagerating when i say that, each day we spent hours swimming, and surfing on our Merrin surf mats. As soon as we got to the beach we would race in, and only come out every now and then for a drink, and lunch, which i remember as vegemite sandwiches, and orange Minor orange juice in a foam insulated drinks container. As soon as the food had settled in our bellies, we’d race off back into the water for another couple of hours. When i look at these old photo’s, i can’t believe how skinny i was, it must have been because of all the time we spent in the surf. Maybe i need to get myself a surf mat again.

JOYLENE THORNBIRD HAIRMOUTH:

Saturday, April 21st, 2007

Thanks to Claustral for the above photo.

Over the last few days i’ve been moving some stuff out
of my old room at my mums house, under the dust and
spider webs i found a pile of my old music magazines
from the late 70’s/early 80’s, i was totally blown
away when i found my collection of clippings and
magazines on the Aussie band ‘Jimmy and the boys’

I hope you all remember this
outrageous band, they were wild, out of control but in looking back they were a great band. Their shows were equal parts theatre and punk, i
was, and AM, devoted to their cross dressing
keyboard player ‘Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth’

Joylene used to faux disembowel herself on stage using
offal, all the while Iggy the lead singer would be
burning baby dolls around her.

In 1980 Joylene ran for the senate and i remember my
sister who worked for the electrol commision at the
time keeping me up to date with Joylenes progress, i
just found the below info on the net, Joylene v’s
Fred Nile!! (Where are you now Joylene!? we need you in
the senate now more than ever!)

1980
SENATE

NEW SOUTH WALES 3,184,997 enrolled, 2,999,196
(94.2%) voted
=======================================================
Five senators to be elected: Quota for election
452,977
——————————————————-
Fred Nile CTA 110,940
04.1 Group A

Joylene Hairmouth 4,334
00.2 Q:0.010

2nd count: McClelland’s 754,205 surplus votes
distributed
————–
Nile 430 (00.1) 111,370
04.1
Hairmouth 31 (00.0) 4,365
00.2
——————————————————–
> 754,205 2,717,858
——————————————————

Classic!! over four thousand votes for a drag queen
way back in 1980!, remember .. this was way
before Priscilla, The sum of us, Queer as folk etc, Joylene
was at the forefront of all that came after.

I remember as a fourteen year old sitting up in the
school library with my friend Vinnie making up ‘How to
vote’ pamphlets for Joylene with a drawing of her on
the front, i absolutely mastered colouring in Joylenes
patented beehive curved wig (‘The Blade’ as we called it)
somewhere during one of my moves i lost the last of
these drawings, i still had one up until a couple of
of years ago, i remember one
of the policies was ‘Put a scone in parliment’

I think i even wrote a song about her, one of the lines
was ‘She’s the queen of the queens’.

To this day whenever mum comes back from the hairdresser
and she’s worried her hair is a little over teased, mum
will ask us ‘It’s not too Joylene is it?’

My friend Ves once told me of a game .. ‘You should have
known you were gay when …. ‘ where you think back
and list the obvious signs, when i think back, how did
i kid myself that people didnt know i was a flaming
queen! a fourteen year old becoming politically active
and aware by supporting a disembowling drag queen!!??

I also found a heap of cassettes at mums that i’d
taped using a little tape machine i’d set up in front
of the tv speaker, they were full of Bette Midler and
Debbie Harry interviews! and i DO remember my
mum saying to me once ‘Dont you think you should like
younger girls?’ .. seriously another ‘You should have
known’ moments.

Please enjoy my humble little tribute to someone who
touched a closeted young queen in Wollongong with her
guts and glory at a time when Australia was a lot harsher place ..

Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth ..

Below: This is a screen capture from the ‘I’m not like everybody else’ video, i love Joylenes Christine Mcvie wig here.

Below: Screen captures from the video for ‘Product of your mind’ i think i remember reading at the time that this was filmed at WIN 4 studios in Wollongong, i remember being quite excited when i heard that .. being a Gong boy and all, this promo is most amazing for the mere fact that never at any other time was Joylenes ‘Blade’ wig so majestically displayed, there are a couple of photos below that capture the true splendour of the beserk cranio bush.

BELOW: I just have to comment on the screen capture below, just look at the confidence in Joylene, she looks like nothing in the world could take her on, not even Gamera or Ghidra on speed, the ‘Blade’ wig is fully extended and shown here for the weapon it was .. a weapon of fashion, extended like the arch of a peacocks tail. Please take note in this clip how Joylene attacks the keyboard with stabs of her hands, i cant help but feel Joylenes style of playing was somewhat influenced by the clips of the keyboard player in Lancelot Link and the Evolution Revolution




Below: A still from the ‘They wont let my girlfriend talk to me’ video, to me Joylene looks just like Maggie Dence who played Aunty Rose Sullivan in the tv series of the same name

Below: Maggie Dence (I need a pic of her as Rose Sullivan so you can see what i mean)

Below: Joylene really was the ultimate rock chick.






Below: Cabaret Joylene.

Below: An example of my Joylene art.

Below: Joylene the minx.





Below: ‘Joylene Unlimited’ Hmmmmm, i think Donnie Sutherland who hosted Sounds Unlimited must have had a soft spot for Joylene as i can recall at least a couple of interviews with Joylene on that show (OH to have had a video recorder in those days) as you can see by the photo producer Allan Carr was on the show once with Joylene, and even (gulp) got to don her famous ‘Blade’ wig.


Below: Joylene more recently with Vanessa Wagner, proving she is still all class and beauty.


Below: My favorite photo of our beloved Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth, Thank you Joylene from the heart of my bottom, for without realising it at the time you helped form, nurture and encourage that part of me that likes to dance around and step outside the square, while others are content to stay inside it and never feel the joy of being unshackled from societies mores.

Not sure of the names of the photographers, i know Bob King took a lot of Joylene, please contact me so i can give credit.

BETTER GET A LAWYER:

Thursday, April 27th, 2006

Perth socialite Rose Porteous will be well enough to face trial later this year on charges of altering a prescription, a court has been told.

Ms Porteous has previously pleaded not guilty to fraudulently altering a prescription for the drug Hypnovel last June.

She was also unable to attend court in March, when her lawyer Shane Brennan presented the court with a letter from his client’s psychiatrist saying Ms Porteous was suffering from a suspected “brain stroke”.

NOTE: Is there any other kind?

Magistrate Paul Heaney then rescheduled the case until today to set a new trial date, saying that if Ms Porteous was not able to set a new trial date, she would need more than the psychiatrist’s letter to show she was too sick.

Today Mr Brennan told Registrar Warren Southwell his client would be well enough to face trial.

He also said she needed more than one day to defend the charges.

“It depends on how things transpire,” Mr Brennan said.

“There’s convoluted medical evidence for a start.”

NOTE: How true.

Mr Southwell set the trial down for October 16 and 17.

NOTE: I’m booking my flight and accomodation for this.

Mr Brennan said he had been unable to give warning before the January trial.

“Unfortunately the state of my client’s illness was not apparent until close to the trial date,” Mr Brennan said.