Posts Tagged ‘Kings Cross’
PARKER, IT’S TIME FOR A LITTLE DRIVE, BRING THE ROLLS:
Wednesday, June 13th, 2012HAIR CURTAIN:
Wednesday, June 13th, 2012
IS THAT A YOUNG KELL NIGHT IN THE BLUE STRIPED PANTS?:
Wednesday, June 13th, 2012
CHEESE AND SPINACH TEENAGE TRIANGLE:
Wednesday, June 13th, 2012
PONDERING THE MONKEY BELLY:
Wednesday, June 13th, 2012
VANITY FUR:
Thursday, November 25th, 2010In a fashion spread that is so common place these days, but not so much in Marta’s time, she took the opportunity to be dressed and stylised as some of her favorite icons. As is now expected of Marta, it was more ‘Razors’ than ‘Cutting’ edge. Pain, self mutilation and careless regard for society’s mores is all de rigour when Marta steps before the camera, so moisten a finger, and prepare to flip through the pages of Marta’s latest documented fashion gift to us ..
ABOVE PIC: Marta tips the hat, and quite possibley the scales, in this tribute to Courtney Love, Marta spared no comfort zone in her dedication to nailing her inspirations, right down to infusing her Courtney-esque wig with head lice, and hacking out a piece of her septum.
ABOVE PIC: Esther Williams never needed goggles, but that isn’t going to stop Marta interpreting what she believes Esther should have been decked out in. In true Marta fashion she insisted that her goggles carry her prescription, so in a fashionabley aqueous act she could wear these goggles with evening wear, and to the theatre.
ABOVE THREE PICS: Annette Funicello come on down!, it’s ‘Beach blanket bingo’ with Marta as she takes to the waves, and risks getting sand in her crack, and a pelt matted by the drying effects of salt water, all in the name of fashion. Speaking of, Marta can’t help herself, she has to fuck with our minds. In the first of the above three photo’s, you can see in tribute to the material girl Madge, Marta got a pair of pliars, and snapped off one of her top mollars, unlike Madge, who merely used black gum make up, Marta self medicated, and snapped the fucker off in front of the bathroom mirror, why? .. for Fah-Fah-Fashion.
ABOVE PIC: Cool as ice, or warm as an ice pipe?, Catherine Deneuve gets the nod here, the all too obvious beret, the beige Jackie O mid seventies jacket, and Marta’s own diamond earings cut from the nastiest mountain in South Africa. What can i say, cool, icey, aloof, chilly .. textbook French.
ABOVE PIC: The first of two biker girl tributes by Marta, and it’s no one you would think. Here Marta takes on the role of the sexually unsatisfied Olive Butler from the UK tv series ‘On the buses’, played by Anna Karen. Poor Olive was always relegated to the side car of her husbands motorbike, which Marta feels was a euphemism for women everywhere, and there circumstance at the time. Marta recognises, and pays tribute to the subtle work done in breaking down these barriers by making sure no bugs ever stuck in her teeth, and it was okay to wear diamonds, even tho relegated to a submissive roll in a motorbike side car, and most importantly, to suck on the exhaust fumes, and get off your nut as you were forced to be merely a passenger (even tho zoning off into the alpha).
ABOVE PIC: Ethnic chic as Marta travels to the Middle East and plays a role within a role, here Marta is styled after Michelle Phillips in ‘Valentino’, who was herself playing Natacha Rambova in the movie, shades of the famous Dali painting, of a painting, of a painting, of a painting etc. A subtle nod also goes out to Linda McCartney who refused to shave her legs, and was pilloried from pillar to post because of this act of non conformity, Marta (who personifies the the words ‘In your face’) does not fuck around, and for weeks before the photo shoot, mainlined testosterone directly into her temple, to ramp up the pelt on her upper chest as a casual ‘Fuck you!’, and as a nod of solidarity to her more hirsute sisters.
ABOVE PIC: The second in the ‘Biker girl’ series, here Marta don’s a ‘Pleather’ jacket, jumps out of the side car, takes the handlebars, and becomes Shelly Winters in ‘Cleopatra Jones’. Note the totally Sixties face viser, the collagen stung lips, and the Easy Rider profile, no happy accidents here.
ABOVE THREE PICS: Marta does Martha (‘Stewart’ that is). Is it any wonder that Marta chose to pay tribute to a woman who’s life has encopassed crocheting colostomy bag covers, macrame wall hangings (used primarilly for auto erotic asphyixiation), and two years hard labour in an all womens prison?, didn’t think so. Anyone who thinks that the cream canister in the first pic is going to be used for the desert is vastly mistaken, Marta knows that nothing rocks your world like having a hit of nitrous from a cream canister, immediately after hammering a bucket bong.
In the second photo Marta contemplates using the flacid chicken as a hat, of course this predates Lady Ga Ga’s meat dress by a good thirty years, but the dripping bacteria from the gibblets swayed Marta away from this act of poultry fashion terrorism, even Marta draws the line at stomach cramps, and projectile gastric in the name of fashion.
Can we please make mention of the stately outfit?, from the drop flowered diamond earrings, the almost, but not quite, hounds tooth dress, the finely cut blouse with what i can only assume are Saville Row tailored sleeves and buttons, and the double, and wide banded watch. All for the kitchen, and all for glamour.
ABOVE PIC: ‘Jocelyn’ nothing more to be said.
ABOVE PIC: Lauren Bacall all the way, Marta makes a flowing entrance, it’s all about the movement and the moment. The scolloped front flows down, but pulls up short of the pubic region, it’s Marta saying ‘You can have a bit, but not everything’. For her cuffs Marta has hacked the cuff’s off an old pair of bell bottom slacks and grafted them on here for winter covereage, i’ve seen this dress worn in spring without the extended arm length, making this dress a little more interactive. The flower burst diamond (of course) earings are on display for all to ogle, and in true Marta fashion, her stockings, or leggings, are actually made from the stretched foam coverings used to protect stone fruits in supermarkets. Jeannie Little may have made a career out of making dresses from garbage bags, but no one recycles waste into fashion like Marta.
ABOVE PIC: With a look of stoicism, unaffected detachement and a serene calm, Marta holds aloft no mere accsesory, but a symbol of repression everywhere in the GLBTI community, the humble turkey baster. Years before ribbons, fundraisers and awareness campaigns, Marta would appear at openings, red carpet roll outs and celebrity events clutching the baster, and much like how Paris Hilton walks around with her rat dog living in her purse (what dog wouldn’t want to live in a confined space packed with drugs) Marta would use this not so much as an accesory, but as more of a statement, to get people talking, to open up a dialog and break down the walls of misunderstanding. In this one photo Marta pays tribute to not only every downtrodden GLBTI actor and actress, but to every GLBTI person who has been shitlisted, shafted, derailed and denied the fundemental, and basic human rights that so many others enjoy. Cast aside your ribbons, and hold aloft the turkey baster as the international symbol of working around, and defeating archaic beliefs and systems, put in place to stop us progressing and procreating. Thank you for this gift Marta, thank you for giving us a visual to identify with, VIVA LA BASTER, VIVA LA MARTA!!.
This collection is dedicated to Shelly, a fine person who knows her Simian style.
HAIRMOUTH AU GO GO:
Tuesday, August 17th, 2010Recently ‘RAGE’ played some old episodes of Countdown, and i was cock o’ hoop to see that they played ‘Product of your mind’ by ‘Jimmy and the boys’, if for no other reason than it features Joylene Hairmouth’s greatest ever filmed performance.
This is the Citizen Kane of Joylene, a veritable Hairmouth cinema verite.
I love this clip soooo fucking much, Joylene is treating the keyboard with such contemp, but it’s trained contemp, she’s going at it like Shirley in the Partridge family, after Ruben Kinkade accidently drugged her, instead of Danny.
Think Marta Hari from Lancelot Linc’s Evolution Revolution .. that style of playing, where the hands look like they are frantically trying to fan someone back into conciousness after a bad, or really good pill.
We all know what was done to those poor bastard monkey’s to get them ramped up and hopping about, simian electro play was the order of the day, and Joylene looks, and performs in this clip like she’s had a car battery freshly clipped to her nipples.
To this very day, each time i enter the Opera House’s grand hall i have a knot in my stomach, knowing that Dame Joan Sutherland and Olivia Newton John opened that place, when all along the first person on the stage should have been the real La Stupenda Joylene.
Let me tell you, i bet Joylene would have had a better camel toe than Olivia did in her black lycra pants in Grease (another starring roll Joylene was jyped out of).
I do my bit, every morning i lay a fresh lilly before the framed photo i have in my lounge room, that was taken last year of Joylene, myself and my filthy bitch bestie ‘Beryl’.
Both Beryl and i agree that besides the night we came across a leather clad, and Rose free Willie Porteous at Sleaze ball, in the downstairs shitters in the Hordern Pavillion, our evening with Joylene was the pinacle of our very existence.
Below are some screen captures i took from the clip. I’ve posted some before, but they were from a lame ass Youtube clip, these are better quality, and it’s all about preserving art in the best possible quality .. and taste.
WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT:
Wednesday, February 18th, 2009
February 12th 2009, a date circled most enthusiastically in my diary, for this was the day when i finally had the honour of paying homage to the most influential lady to ever cross the entertainment, and political stages of Australia. Forget your Chelsea Brown’s and Bronwyn Bishops, none of them hold a melting candle to Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth.
Joylene was starring in a show at the factory theatre ‘Betcha thought i was dead .. ‘ and so it was that the collective Miss’s Tammy, Stephanie, Beryl and Viv went along with butterflies sniffing amyl in our bellies, such was the level of our excitement.
I cant go into a review of the show, it was one of those ‘You just have to see it to believe it’ situations, i went merely excited to be seeing Joylene for the first time but we left having seen an amazingly well written, and sharp piece of theatre.
At the end of the show Joylene left the stage, i thought alas my chance of kneeling before her to pay my respects had flown out the window, but upon leaving the theatre and entering the foyer Miss Stephanie squealed ‘She’s here!’ and so we hung back while Joylene conversed with some friends of hers, i was amazed to realize that for almost the first time in my life i was nervous to be meeting a star!.
I’ve met more famous people than Beryl has had interventions, I’ve done all the biggies, including Diana and Paul McCartney, but Joylene was rooted a little deeper in my belly.
When i thought about it i realised that Joylene was someone who struck a very deep, and early chord with me .. but not an obvious one, Diana yeah for the glam, and Paul for the music, but Joylene went deeper, to a darker more hidden place.
Then it all came together for me while waiting to meet her, when i used to watch Joylene on tv when i was a kid, she was a drag terrorist, she was doing things that no one would dare do in 1970’s Australia, a disemboweling drag queen appearing on the daytime blue rinse Mike Walsh show?, a self immolating drag queen running for the Australian senate?, my little fourteen year old eyes were watching all this, and tho I’ve never had the urge to don an osti frock, i was desperate to be however, and whatever i was meant to be.
I felt crushed, compressed and moulded into what i was supposed to be, or expected to be, but through watching Joylene all those years, it must have sunk in deep, that you can step outside the square, you can do whatever you want to do (sometimes at a high cost, but surely it’s a higher cost to not do that) it is possible to not fit the mold.
I now know that that is what my little eyes were taking in.
When Joylene finished talking to her friends, i went over and introduced myself, and instantly i felt a warmth, a sense of gratitude to her i could not convey. It was a joy for me to see the sense of wonder in Beryl’s eyes as she realised she was in the presence of greatness, she was standing before Australia’s very own Drag terrorist, our very own Filth Queen if you will, and no matter how many rats have lived in Beryl’s drag wigs, she could never hold a torch to Joylenes monolithic, iconic beehive blade (Which should be in the Powerhouse museum along with Joylene’s other fashions, i mean if they can have an exhibition of Diana’s dresses and artifacts surely one dedicated to Joylene cant be far away).
Joylene was so very gracious, and entertained us for several minutes, and accommodated photo’s and autograph’s, we bid our thanks and farewell’s, after fullfilling our desire, to prone ourselves, to prostrate ourselves before her size 12 court heels, in utter gratitude, and thanks.
It was rather telling when we were outside, Stephanie commented ‘Isn’t it lovely when you meet someone you love and admire, and they aren’t an arsehole’.
Click here for my previous Joylene post.
Once again Joylene, thank you from the heart of my bottom.
Family ties.
Wednesday, May 23rd, 2007It’s a total pisser to me that huge amount of my family now lives in Queensland, but thankfully we have all stayed close. I was flicking through a photo album the other day, and found this photo of Adam and i, taken with my niece Michelle last year. The photo next to it showed me with my sister, as well as Michelle and her two sisters Kylie and Danielle in the surf at Mollymook, when we were just little kids. Whats with all this reflection lately with me?, pulling my old notice board to pieces, finding old photographs, throwing out a heap of old stuff i once clung to, am i De-nesting?.
PIC 1: I was lucky enough to have a lot of my nieces and nephews born soon after me so the bonus is that they are all more like brothers and sisters to me than nieces and nephews, i was only seven when my third niece was born!
PIC 2: Me, my big sister, and three nieces in the surf at Mollymook. Every summer the whole family, inc aunts, uncles, cousins etc would decend, en masse to Burill Lake on the south coast. Unless it was pissing down with rain, we would spend pretty much every day at the beach, not just one, but a whole array of beaches. I’m not exagerating when i say that, each day we spent hours swimming, and surfing on our Merrin surf mats. As soon as we got to the beach we would race in, and only come out every now and then for a drink, and lunch, which i remember as vegemite sandwiches, and orange Minor orange juice in a foam insulated drinks container. As soon as the food had settled in our bellies, we’d race off back into the water for another couple of hours. When i look at these old photo’s, i can’t believe how skinny i was, it must have been because of all the time we spent in the surf. Maybe i need to get myself a surf mat again.
JOYLENE THORNBIRD HAIRMOUTH:
Saturday, April 21st, 2007
Thanks to Claustral for the above photo.
Over the last few days i’ve been moving some stuff out
of my old room at my mums house, under the dust and
spider webs i found a pile of my old music magazines
from the late 70’s/early 80’s, i was totally blown
away when i found my collection of clippings and
magazines on the Aussie band ‘Jimmy and the boys’
I hope you all remember this
outrageous band, they were wild, out of control but in looking back they were a great band. Their shows were equal parts theatre and punk, i
was, and AM, devoted to their cross dressing
keyboard player ‘Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth’
Joylene used to faux disembowel herself on stage using
offal, all the while Iggy the lead singer would be
burning baby dolls around her.
In 1980 Joylene ran for the senate and i remember my
sister who worked for the electrol commision at the
time keeping me up to date with Joylenes progress, i
just found the below info on the net, Joylene v’s
Fred Nile!! (Where are you now Joylene!? we need you in
the senate now more than ever!)
1980
SENATE
NEW SOUTH WALES 3,184,997 enrolled, 2,999,196
(94.2%) voted
=======================================================
Five senators to be elected: Quota for election
452,977
——————————————————-
Fred Nile CTA 110,940
04.1 Group A
Joylene Hairmouth 4,334
00.2 Q:0.010
2nd count: McClelland’s 754,205 surplus votes
distributed
————–
Nile 430 (00.1) 111,370
04.1
Hairmouth 31 (00.0) 4,365
00.2
——————————————————–
> 754,205 2,717,858
——————————————————
Classic!! over four thousand votes for a drag queen
way back in 1980!, remember .. this was way
before Priscilla, The sum of us, Queer as folk etc, Joylene
was at the forefront of all that came after.
I remember as a fourteen year old sitting up in the
school library with my friend Vinnie making up ‘How to
vote’ pamphlets for Joylene with a drawing of her on
the front, i absolutely mastered colouring in Joylenes
patented beehive curved wig (‘The Blade’ as we called it)
somewhere during one of my moves i lost the last of
these drawings, i still had one up until a couple of
of years ago, i remember one
of the policies was ‘Put a scone in parliment’
I think i even wrote a song about her, one of the lines
was ‘She’s the queen of the queens’.
To this day whenever mum comes back from the hairdresser
and she’s worried her hair is a little over teased, mum
will ask us ‘It’s not too Joylene is it?’
My friend Ves once told me of a game .. ‘You should have
known you were gay when …. ‘ where you think back
and list the obvious signs, when i think back, how did
i kid myself that people didnt know i was a flaming
queen! a fourteen year old becoming politically active
and aware by supporting a disembowling drag queen!!??
I also found a heap of cassettes at mums that i’d
taped using a little tape machine i’d set up in front
of the tv speaker, they were full of Bette Midler and
Debbie Harry interviews! and i DO remember my
mum saying to me once ‘Dont you think you should like
younger girls?’ .. seriously another ‘You should have
known’ moments.
Please enjoy my humble little tribute to someone who
touched a closeted young queen in Wollongong with her
guts and glory at a time when Australia was a lot harsher place ..
Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth ..
Below: This is a screen capture from the ‘I’m not like everybody else’ video, i love Joylenes Christine Mcvie wig here.
Below: Screen captures from the video for ‘Product of your mind’ i think i remember reading at the time that this was filmed at WIN 4 studios in Wollongong, i remember being quite excited when i heard that .. being a Gong boy and all, this promo is most amazing for the mere fact that never at any other time was Joylenes ‘Blade’ wig so majestically displayed, there are a couple of photos below that capture the true splendour of the beserk cranio bush.
BELOW: I just have to comment on the screen capture below, just look at the confidence in Joylene, she looks like nothing in the world could take her on, not even Gamera or Ghidra on speed, the ‘Blade’ wig is fully extended and shown here for the weapon it was .. a weapon of fashion, extended like the arch of a peacocks tail. Please take note in this clip how Joylene attacks the keyboard with stabs of her hands, i cant help but feel Joylenes style of playing was somewhat influenced by the clips of the keyboard player in Lancelot Link and the Evolution Revolution
Below: A still from the ‘They wont let my girlfriend talk to me’ video, to me Joylene looks just like Maggie Dence who played Aunty Rose Sullivan in the tv series of the same name
Below: Maggie Dence (I need a pic of her as Rose Sullivan so you can see what i mean)
Below: Joylene really was the ultimate rock chick.
Below: Cabaret Joylene.
Below: An example of my Joylene art.
Below: Joylene the minx.
Below: ‘Joylene Unlimited’ Hmmmmm, i think Donnie Sutherland who hosted Sounds Unlimited must have had a soft spot for Joylene as i can recall at least a couple of interviews with Joylene on that show (OH to have had a video recorder in those days) as you can see by the photo producer Allan Carr was on the show once with Joylene, and even (gulp) got to don her famous ‘Blade’ wig.
Below: Joylene more recently with Vanessa Wagner, proving she is still all class and beauty.
Below: My favorite photo of our beloved Joylene Thornbird Hairmouth, Thank you Joylene from the heart of my bottom, for without realising it at the time you helped form, nurture and encourage that part of me that likes to dance around and step outside the square, while others are content to stay inside it and never feel the joy of being unshackled from societies mores.
Not sure of the names of the photographers, i know Bob King took a lot of Joylene, please contact me so i can give credit.
BETTER GET A LAWYER:
Thursday, April 27th, 2006
Perth socialite Rose Porteous will be well enough to face trial later this year on charges of altering a prescription, a court has been told.
Ms Porteous has previously pleaded not guilty to fraudulently altering a prescription for the drug Hypnovel last June.
She was also unable to attend court in March, when her lawyer Shane Brennan presented the court with a letter from his client’s psychiatrist saying Ms Porteous was suffering from a suspected “brain stroke”.
NOTE: Is there any other kind?
Magistrate Paul Heaney then rescheduled the case until today to set a new trial date, saying that if Ms Porteous was not able to set a new trial date, she would need more than the psychiatrist’s letter to show she was too sick.
Today Mr Brennan told Registrar Warren Southwell his client would be well enough to face trial.
He also said she needed more than one day to defend the charges.
“It depends on how things transpire,” Mr Brennan said.
“There’s convoluted medical evidence for a start.”
NOTE: How true.
Mr Southwell set the trial down for October 16 and 17.
NOTE: I’m booking my flight and accomodation for this.
Mr Brennan said he had been unable to give warning before the January trial.
“Unfortunately the state of my client’s illness was not apparent until close to the trial date,” Mr Brennan said.
MELBOURNE:
Sunday, April 23rd, 2006
I’m spending a few days in Melbourne with my mate Phillip, he can be found wired for sound and photo’s at www.melbourneloft.com while down here i’m going to catch up with as many friends as i possibley can including Dicko and Garry who i’ll be appearing alongside on the radio tomorrow night www.stereo974.com
Melbourne as ever is fantastic, the only thing that would stop me moving here is the fact that it’s so special every time i visit, i dont ever want to take it for granted.
DARH-LINK:
Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
You know it was just one of those day’s, a lazy Sunday afternoon, the sun was shining bright, all was right with the world and I was catching up with my friend Dave from Melbourne who I hadn’t seen in over twelve months, as we window shopped our way up and down King St Newtown we turned into an antique store
.. Like a beacon on an ink black night something caught our eyes high up on a shelf, a glowing pink box, a sight so rare, so majestic, it drew us to it as if moving in slow motion, just before we reached it I caught Dave faltering out of the corner of my eyes, I read his face as it creased and spelt out ‘No, this can’t be real .. I’m not seeing this wondrous item before me’ I gathered my composure and continued forward until my hand clasped around this most precious prize, I knew at that moment that we would not be separated ..
Dave’s eyes were misty as he continued forward in slow motion towards me, a guttural ‘Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!’ could be heard escaping from his lips.
I held my purchase aloft, I clasped it to my chest .. I wanted for a moment to be at one with it, to connect .. after all, it’s not every day a boy finds an original Eva Gabor wig in it’s original packaging, in mint condition for only $15.00 is it?
UNCLE:
Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
Sunday we celebrated my nephews birthday, what does a caring and responsible uncle like myself buy him for a present? .. non other than this totally toxic and highly flamable Michael Jackson wig and hat. The above photo is what they used on the packaging, i’m thinking this faux afro isnt an officially licenced product from ‘Neverland enterprises’
JOAN:
Thursday, April 13th, 2006A big thrill for me whilst in America was getting to visit Joan Crawford’s house in Brentwood, quite close to where Marilyn Monroe lived.
Some of the photo’s i have of Joan are quite bizzare, whilst i’m not sure the following two classify as bizzare they are a little weird.
PHOTO # 1
In this photo it looks as if Joan was auditioning for the role of Marge Simpson.
PHOTO # 2
Here we have Joan with Colonel Sanders, probably trying to tie up a cross promotion with KFC and Joan’s beloved Pepsi.
PATSY BISCOE AKE PATE BISCUIT:
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006Another op shop find last week was an album from my past, the ‘Patsy Biscoe songbook’ Patsy used to be on the Aussie kids show ‘Here’s Humphrey’ each day Patsy would lead the children at in a sing along, how exciting! i can still remember Patsy’s distinctive finger picking style on her ‘folk’ guitar, many years later poor Patsy down graded and was reduced to busking on ‘Fat cat and friends’ .. a poor man’s ‘Humphrey’ by any measure, altho Fat Cat is the source of one of my favorite jokes ever ‘What’s the difference between you and Fat Cat? .. Fat Cat had friends!’
Most recently Patsy was seen on the ‘Big Gig’ a fantastic comedy show, they used to have a charactor on the show called Pate’ Biscuit who looked and acted an awful lot like Patsy, except Pate’ would tell horrible and horrid stories to the ‘Children at home’ one night in the middle of Pate’s act the real Patsy turned up and had a go at her clone nemesis, i must have a photo of that somewhere.
The one thing i forgot was how mega Patsy’s hair was in the early day’s .. no wonder i had a soft spot for her.
ROSE PORTEOUS UPDATE:
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006Chaos is surrounding poor Rose Porteous at the moment, first she was arrested for falsifying a medical pescription, she had altered the script so it had more repeats .. a lot more repeats. The best part is Rose’s defense, she claims she mistook the script for a lotto form and that’s why she wrote down the large number! is it any wonder we love her so?
When Rose was due to appear in court to face the charges she was aledgedy too ill to attend, this didn’t stop her however appearing at a charity shoe auction, you can see Rose in the photo below modeling her shoe with a HUGE diamond on the toe.
Soon after Rose collapsed .. I have a vast number of clippings documenting Rose’s collapses, I think Rose has dropped more times than Jason Donovan at his most ‘asthmatic’ but this time it’s reported Rose has had a stroke.
Compounding this was the trauma of watching her former home .. the legendary ‘Prix d’amour’ smashed to the ground by the demolition men, what a sad end to a house that has seen so many outrageous acts and incidents.
PHOTO # 1
Rose raises a foot adorned with a sparkly rock for charity.
PHOTO # 2
The tractors claw gouges away at Roses portico, it almost looks like performance art.
PHOTO # 3
My photo of Rose which adorns my fridge door, here we can see i have added Adam’s false eyelashes to Rose’s photo .. stunning.
HITCHIN:
Friday, April 7th, 2006
Sight of the day .. I’m driving along the road and there was some school’s cross country run under way, there were a couple of hundred kids running along the footpath, some were sprinting, some jogging and a few puffing and snorting, one kid tho had obviously had enough, he stood on the side of the road hitchhiking!.
DUSTY:
Thursday, April 6th, 2006Spent a great weekend in Sydney with Adam ,his mum and our friend Min. We went to the glam(less) Star City Casino to see the musical ‘Dusty’ which i must admit i was pretty impressed by, my sister is a Dusty freak from way back and she is now popping to go. Before we go to the casino we took a walk through Newtown and had lunch, we all agreed that if we ever had to move to Sydney Newtown is still the place we’d all choose to live.
PHOTO 1
That’s me, Adam and Adam’s mum having lunch in Newtown at the North Indian Diner, this is a pretty famous place in Newtown, it’s really popular probably because it’s so cheap and great value, i found myself having a ‘bizaro moment’ while sitting there, i was zoning out thinking of all times and situations i’ve found myself eating in this place, some of them quite bizzare, some just plain happy and joyful, and now here i was sitting with my boyfriend and his mum .. it was just one of those ‘Did i ever imagine back then that i’d be sitting here years later with someone i love and adore, along with his mum’ moments? .. like i said, bizaro.
PHOTO 2
Hmmmmm, the remanants of my lunch, a glob of fetta cheese, i looked at this and thought ‘Thats probably what the inside of one of my arteries look’s like’ i have now sworn off a lot of globby food and i’m back to swimming.
PHOTO 3
Dusty, a true legend .. do yourselves the preverbial favour and give her another listen, what a pure and soulful voice.
PHOTO 4
Would this sign prick your conscience?
PHOTO 5
Glamour stairs.
PHOTO 6
Me’n’Min
NINE LIVES:
Thursday, April 6th, 2006Surely this sad excuse for a human being has used up all of his political lives by now?
LOCAL BOY MAKES GOOD:
Thursday, April 6th, 2006A couple of photo’s of Ben Kersten who won gold in the comonwealth games, he lives in Kiama but used to live in Figtree just around the corner from the very first ‘protoloft’ www.melbourneloft.com
FRIENDS AND HIGH HAIR:
Sunday, March 26th, 2006We’ve had a long hot summer down, we’re a month into autumn and still we’re heading to the beach swimming and surfing, the lucky thing for me is I live really close to the beach, so it doesn’t take too much arm twisting for friends to head over for a visit, and that’s whats been happening the last several weeks, a visit, a swim and then out to dinner. One terrifying consequence of me spending time in salt water is for whatever reason or phenomena my hair stands up on end in spikes, poor Phillip at www.melbourneloft.com has horrible nighmares at the mere thought of of one strand of my hair raising itself from my scalp, I must mention Phillip performed many interventions on me in the early 90’s during some ‘experimental’ hair periods.
CRYSTAL PILLARS:
HIGH HAIR:
DINNER:
MOUNTIE:
Tuesday, February 28th, 2006Alas our buddy, friend and pal Marc has now returned to the land of the long white something or other, we said our goodbyes over yummy Mexican food at Amigo’s, hopefully Marc will be back before too long or barring that, Adam and i will be able to sashay over to Canada.
FAIRLY FAIR DAY:
Tuesday, February 28th, 2006And so another Mardi Gras Fair Day comes around and most every queen and dyke frets over what to wear whilst looking stylishly unconcerned. T’was a fun day and made all the more so because we organized ourselves so we were all in town at the same time and together, we moved and walked as a pack and it was hard not to feel a sense of pride at the beautiful and wonderous friends i was surrounded by, slowly the scorching sun and soup like humidity took it’s toll and friends slowly peeled away to search for cooler climes, the hardy amongst us found shade and the beer tent. I was somewhat heartend that this year i was not handed one flyer for a gym or tanning salon, perhaps i now carry the air of a lost cause on those counts, and the question begs to be asked .. why am i the only one not wearing my sunnies in the group photo’s, even tho i had them on me, should i read more into this than i am?
MONKEY BELLY:
Tuesday, February 28th, 2006I’m partial to a monkey belly on a guy, and i’m partial to Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys, put the two together and we have a winning combination.
STRIKE A POSE:
Tuesday, February 21st, 2006To placate the baying mobs of Marta fans who want more more more fashion, stand by for a spread of shere cutting edge beauty.
Photo # 1
Annie the primate Oakly, who would have ever thought tassles could look so alluring against a backdrop of natural fur? once again Marta shows that a real lady never steps outside the front door without earings, no one does ear furniture like Marta.
Photo # 2
Ya gotta love a girl who wears a ribbon tie, here we have Marta stepping out for a little show jumping, the Cindy Crawford beauty spots says ‘Look at me!, i am fantastic’.
Photo # 3
Not Marta, but a co-star showing how mutton chop sideburns were’nt the sole domain of Bernard King.
TAKING A DIVE:
Wednesday, February 8th, 2006Taking a dive: Lest it been thought that I’m a total grump about Ostray-yah day, there was the alluring sight of drunk boys diving and bellyflopping into the harbour that did keep us mildly amused for an hour or two 
OSTRAY-YA DAY:
Wednesday, February 8th, 2006A couple of weeks ago while we were ‘celebrating’ Australia day i had a funny feeling in my belly. As we walked around the harbour and the crowds of people something was niggling me, it wasnt until later in the day that i figured out what it was, it was anger. As we sat on the harbour wall i looked at the crowds, many of whom were draped in the Australian flag. I kept thinking ‘Why are you celebrating?’ were/are all those people happy with the way Australia is spiraling out of control into an almost conservative dictatorship?, the constant attacks on unions, gay rights, refugee’s, workplace relations etc etc.
I dont know what angered me more, the fact that these people ‘wanted’ to celebrate or the fact that they were too indifferent to care. All i know is ‘I’ didnt feel like celebrating, how long before that changes? .. please dont let it be long, i cant stand to read too many more horror stories that our political reporting has become.
I’ve attached a couple of letters from the paper i kept from early last year soon after Howard was elected again as our prime minister, these letters give me some sort of hope that i’m not alone in my thinking.
SHIRTY:
Wednesday, February 8th, 2006Another trawl through the Tingle video archives has turned up my collection of ‘Shirty the slightly aggressive bear’ these clips still make me laugh.
MARC:
Monday, February 6th, 2006My friend Marc from Canada is visiting at the moment, we dont get to see each other nearly enough, the last time Marc was here was in Aprill 2005, we had a short holiday in Melbourne staying with Phillip whilst there Marc and i got to visit the Andy Warhol ‘Time capsules’ exhibition, it was a fun day but very intense, Marc and i have both admired Andy for many years. The following photos were taken at the exhibition.
PIFFY:
Saturday, February 4th, 2006Just to keep Tyson
happy and quiet, I am today revisiting the ‘Tingle film and video archive’ I have dug out a favorite of many of us here in the Tammy inner circle, this is another golden moment from ‘Pot of gold/Pot luck’ what we have here is a maniacal bell ringer!, I kid you not, the little dynamo is/was called ‘Piffy’, this lad had a heap of mini cow bells laid out on the table before him, each tuned to perfection, the backing track would start and off he’d go, not just the melody .. oh no, the Piffster even had the harmony parts worked out.
About half way through the song the tempo suddenly doubled in time, sending poor Piffy into a whirl, he was like someone with ADD who’d never seen a ritalin pill!.
Bernard the judge gave I believe a perfect score of ’40’.
The response to Piffy was amazing when this show was rebroadcast years later, the next week as a surprise they brought Piffy back all grown up, but no less manic.
Photo # 1 Here we see Piffy revving up, is that a ruffled shirt I see under the satin jumpsuit?
Photo # 2 Piffy the performer, even during this complex song Piffy never stopped smiling, in this photo we can see he wasn’t sticking to the melody, here I think with multiple bells he was forming a complex CM7 chord, he may even have used the old trick of dampening the bells.
Photo # 3 Bernard has found a star, in what is believed to be the only time in his career as a judge, Bernard gifts Piffy with a perfect ’40’.
Photo # 4 Years later Piffy made a return to TV to prove has was no less talented and no less manic, it’s heartening to see Piffys lack of teeth had resolved itself by the time of his comeback.
NEWTOWN:
Saturday, February 4th, 2006Still the coolest place in Sydney, where else can you find advertisments for Iggy Pop and eczama within a few feet of each other?, it’s the only place i could live if i ever have to move to the big smoke, spent the last day of my summer holidays just walking the streets, shopping and eating and drinking (lots) as with any inner city place, on a hot summers day there is no place hotter, all that ashphelt and cement = hot hot hot.
MR FREEZE:
Saturday, February 4th, 2006Hmmm, me thinks it might be time to call the refrigerator mechanic in.
GO AWAY!!:
Saturday, February 4th, 2006If there is one thing I cant stand is an artist who announces their retirement only to make a spectacular comeback when either the taxman comes knocking, or they realize they cant live with out the roar .. Or groan, of the crowd. One such person is the Aussie singer John Farnham who for a myriad of reasons I just cant stand, I was filled with glee when only a couple of years ago he hung up his touring boots and called it a day, alas I now read in our local paper that he will be returning to the concert stage with a show in my home town, please John, just go away.
TICKLE ME:
Tuesday, January 31st, 2006Ahhhh, the America i love. While visiting the U.S we had the chance to visit the site of this truely tacky and sad incident, THIS is the sort of thing that will always draw me back to the U.S.
October 24, 2005; Page A1
HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Last Wednesday, the furry red Muppet named Elmo learned that Hollywood Boulevard is a long, long way from Sesame Street.
In plain sight of children and tourists, Elmo — or at least, a man named Don Harper in a knockoff Elmo costume — was arrested here by the Los Angeles Police Department. Elmo was taken down by a special task force created to combat a growing nuisance in the Hollywood tourist district: famous costumed characters who try to be photographed with tourists and sometimes badger them relentlessly for tips.
LAPD officers, posing as clueless foreign tourists in front of Mann’s Chinese Theater, also busted Mr. Incredible, the superhero from the animated hit “The Incredibles,” as well as a man dressed as the villain from the “Scream” movie franchise. The icons were arrested and could face charges ranging from illegal vending to aggressive begging.
But today, police estimate anywhere from 70 to 80 characters work the one-block stretch that includes not only the Chinese Theater, but also the Kodak Theater (home of the Academy Awards) and a new retail and entertainment center called Hollywood & Highland.
“When I first started here 13 years ago, you had Charlie Chaplin hanging around [the] Chinese Theater, and that was it,” says Leron Gubler, president and chief executive of the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce. “Now, they’re multiplying like rabbits.”
The characters — have gotten more aggressive both with tourists and each other. Fights erupt over precious sidewalk space, especially when two of the same characters show up. Characters grab tourists as they walk down the street. Some of the scarier costumed entertainers jump out at the crowd and frighten children. Perhaps most worrisome is the practice of demanding tips from foreign tourists who don’t know the custom, language or currency.
Mr. Harper, the 40-year-old Elmo, says he was set up by the cops. But upon returning to his spot a day after his arrest, he conceded that things are tense these days among the characters, who form cliques and alliances to defend their turf and make money. Mr. Harper, for example, says his Elmo is a foe of Batman and Superman, but in cahoots with Mr. Incredible, SpongeBob SquarePants and at least one of the half-dozen Spider-Men who prowl the street.
THE TWANG HEARD AROUND THE WORLD:
Sunday, January 29th, 2006A few weeks ago I splurged and brought myself a DVD recorder, the best thing about this is how easy it is to transfer old video tapes to DVD. At last count I had over 670 hours of video tape of all sorts of things I’ve taped over the years, to teach myself how to use this new machine I thought I should dig out some interesting stuff and have a play around with it.
The first thing I reached for was my old episodes of ‘Pot of gold/Pot luck’,
this was an amateur talent show that showcased some truly hideous performances, but best of all one of the judges was Bernard King, Bernard was merciless in his judging and no one was spared his barbs. After transferring the show to DVD I have been going through the episodes getting screen captures of some of the contestants.
The first one I’m featuring was a guy called Todd Rixon, he was a dancer .. of sorts, flailing and prancing around the stage, he was letting fly with a few high kicks until one was a little too high, in an instant he had snapped his ham string muscle.
Photo # 1 The twang heard around the world, as Todd goes for one high kick too many and comes unstuck when his hamstring gives way
Photo # 2 Here we see Todd spiraling out of control as he bravely attempts to uphold the adage ‘The show must go on’, alas as we can see by the contorted feet and body in mid spasm Todd was only going one place, and that was down.
Photo # 3 The greatest indignity of all, poor Todd having to be held up by host Ernie Sigley, what a trouper Todd was, before his final collapse and acknowledgement of defeat when he realized his legs no longer worked, he tried to incorporate some Michael Jackson ‘Beat it-esque’ hand moves to deflect attention from his flagging legs. Bernard, in a rare moment of kindness realized you cant kick a man when there is a very real chance he may never dance again, so he kindly offered up a score of 20 sympathy points.
COOL CHANGE FOR MARTA:
Wednesday, January 25th, 2006The last of Marta for today, with the seasons changing faster than Jocelyne Wildenstein’s face, i thought today we would feature Marta in a fetching winter creation, i know we have a few months to go, but if you want to be ahead of the field then you better get copying, and knitting, to emulate Marta’s look before every two bit slapper is pulling on the winter woolies.
Photo # 1
Marta shows that a jumper can never be too tight, or too green.
Photo # 2
Here Marta proves that red and green CAN be seen, even if you’re not going to the snow this season follow Marta’s lead and carry skis and stock’s with you at all times, the word here is accessories.
Photo # 3
Never mind you wont be within 500 kilometers of snow this year, THESE are the glasses to be seen wearing around town this winter, and i dont mean to be tiresome but once again Marta scores a hole in one by matching her jumper with mint green earings.
CRAWFORD PRODUCTION:
Wednesday, January 25th, 2006For whatever bizzare reason our regional tv station here in Wollongong WIN 4 has decided to start playing reruns of classic Aussie cop shows and drama’s at 3.00am each morning, and they have a different show every day of the week, so far we’ve had the ‘Sullivan’s’ ‘Division 4’ ‘Holiday island’ ‘Matlock’ and ‘Skyways’ (still waiting for the episode featuring a VERY young Kylie and Jason to be shown) better spark up the old vcr and catch these while i can.
WHAT HE SAID:
Wednesday, January 25th, 2006‘Spose there wasnt enough room on the guy’s
t-shirt to say what he really wanted to say, still .. short and to the point does the trick.
FREEDOM:
Wednesday, January 25th, 2006I have this clipping on my notice board at home, i get pretty disheartend when i see the complacency that has overrun the gay community not only here in Aussie but world wide, not that i’m judging too harshly, our community is tired, battle scarred and bruised in the Neocon world we now live in, it’s an interesting, yet scarey .. bordering on terrifying time we now live in, and people my age (40) are at the right age to really notice the change, it was only recently .. maybe less than ten years ago, where it seemed we were moving forward with rights, relationship acknowledgement, freedom, sense of community.
We were on a roll, but now over the past few years we have had to watch as this has started to grind to a halt, as the world has shifted into an oppresive conservative age. This has all happend so quick, and it’s especially noticable down here in Aussie, where gay rights and legislation are being repealed!?, still what do you expect when something as basic as workers rights are being smashed and levelled on a daily basis.
Still, what i cling to is the notion that ‘The tide go’s in, the tide go’s out’ and that this madness wont spiral out of control and people will remember what we had and how far we had come, and then gasp it back before too much more is lost.
It will take three things for this to happen, people (Mr, Ms amd Mrs Joe Average) will have to be ..
* Less fearful of what the government feeds us
* Less greedy
* Less complacent.
This is a serious Tammy signing off.
