Ahhhh, Melbourne, let me count the ways how i love thee.

If these people were so smart and knew more than us, then why didn’t they know ebay was coming where they could have sold all this vinyl and merchandise where they could have made a killing.

Just like Santa, Tony Clifton is real, and no one will ever convince me otherwise.

Recently my friend Gordon turned forty and had a bit of a knee’s up, i had the chance to put glowing orb’s over my breast and under my velor top, for that reason alone the night will long be held close to my heart.

I have no reason to post this photo other than the fact that i think he looks mighty fine in a sort scruffy Ethan Hawke sort of way, without the whole shitting on Uma thing, so who is this guy?.

Not to be ‘niecist’ after posting some pics of a few of my nephews i grabbed this pic of Michele and i when she made a flying visit to Sydney, she was here for a mathematics convention, she knows her times tables .. i don’t, Michelle knows never to call call me uncle, especially seeing as there is only something like eighteen months between us.

It is only now that i’m allowing some of my younger nephews refer to me as uncle, it always seemed just too weird when some of them were only a few years younger than me, a sign of me aging?.

While out touring country Victoria i came across an inordinate amount of bizzaro dolls in antique and collectible stores, i have dubbed the final doll in this series ‘The Hood doll’ she has the same scary eyes as The Hood does on The Thunderbirds.

TV WEEK:

Some issues of TV Week have recently come up on ebay, these are all gold, if only for the covers, they are such a treasure trove or retro Aussie, camp pop culture.

LUCY:

William Shatner warms up his vocal chords before recording his classic version of Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

GOON:

Is there anything sadder than an abandoned goon bladder? .. didn’t think so.

PRRRRT:

Do you think they market researched the name for this?, i’m not picking this up and handing it over the counter .. no way.

GLCS:

My friend Chris who is also training to become a counsellor at the Gay And Lesbian Counselling Service, I’ve known Chris for year’s but it’s been great to become closer friends recently (What’s with this theme going on here on the blog with all the friends? .. i think I’d better get out the texta’s and butcher’s paper and workshop this.)

UNDER THE MIRROR BALL:

For my nephew Kylan’s first birthday party his mum’s did the decorating and i was ecstatic to see that they had supplied a mirror ball for the little guy, how cool is that, i mean ‘Mr Gaspo’ is just SOOOOOO last year.

MR WHIPENHEIMER:

However .. it’s store fronts and images like these from my many visits to Melbourne that makes me want to stay there, or at the very least visit more and more, i’m totally torn between my love between Sydney and Melbourne, for now Melbourne must stay the mistress.

GOLD:

Not an excercise in ego, i’m posting this photo for the shade on the water, this blows me out and makes me realise that just when i’ve had enough of Sydney you walk by the harbour at dusk and the water literally turns golden, no photoshop tricks here, just a moment of time and nature captured.

MANKY FOOT:

Seriously, what could be wrong with your foot that you would need this palm pilot podiatric cheese grater, this portable smallgood slicer .. cards on the table, i just cant do manky feet, some people should keep their feet covered at all times, or at least make a little thong veil for them, something .. anything because nothing turns my stomach more, and i mean nothing.

CONKY:

My favorite finger puppet.

MY OLD FRIENDS:

I wrote something on Facebook recently about realising how lucky i am to still have friends from when i was little, or as i think i described it ‘Before we had hair that we could sit on’ (Wink and pistol finger to Dame Edna for that chestnut) it’s a source of imense joy to me to see these guys happy and settled and raising family’s with the most amazing kids and partners, it’s when things go right for people who deserve it, i was gonna post photo’s of us together when we were younger but i had a violent stomach cramping Dorian Grey moment when i looked and compared at how much i have aged, my old photo albums are being pushed further and further back on the shelf (Actually thats bullshit, i think it’s freakin’ amazing to have gotten this far through life and i give thanks each and every day for all the amazing things i’ve experienced, learnt, processed and all the interesting people who have crossed my path)

DEE DEE L’MAR:

Dee Dee is a local drag legend, in fact beyond legend she is an ‘Entity’, she was the first drag queen i’d ever really got to know about 15 years ago, she still floats in and out of my life and these pics were only taken a couple of months ago at a friends birthday, it may not be good for her drag image to say this but Dee Dee is actually the salt of the earth and someone i admire a lot for many reasons.

PAL MEATYLESS BITES:

Many balk at my faux meaty chunks i use to cook with, but once they are in the pot with all the other yummy ingredients they really do pass off as more flavoursome than the turdlettes they look like.

ALTERNATIVE PARENTING A.B.C:

My sister has always been an innovator and led the field in alternative parenting, if it’s not watching her son roll around in a tumble drier it’s experimenting with blasting her daughter in the face with an industrial air pump, stand by for further updates.

WONKY MIRROR IN MELBOURNE:

RALPH LAUREN:

BASH, BASH, BASH, BASH .. Thats the sound of my head hitting the floor, i can’t believe i didn’t buy this jumper when i saw it in Melbourne during my July visit, it is quite simply in my eyes, perfection .. BASH, BASH, BASH, BASH.

SPENCER:

My nephew Spencer (Spez) cutest cheeks ever.

ALL BASES COVERED:

MEN THAT LOOK LIKE OLD LESBIANS:

Step up and take a bow Steven Tyler.

GREAT CONCEPT THAT TASTES LIKE UTTER SHIT:

SHITTER AFICIONADO:

The above photo showcases the high level of class amongst the students where i work, perhaps i shouldn’t be so dismissive, I’d like to think one of our artier students actually done this as an art installation, i live in hope .. and secret admiration.

This baby i stumbled upon at a restaurant in Newtown, i was in awe at the extreme ‘Servery platter’ shitter bowl, for the life of me i don’t know what the design advantages are to having a landing strip in the bowl, i have to wonder if the owners picked this up from an auction of medical supplies and this bowl was actually used for examination and dissection, an unsavoury topic for sure, but you do have to wonder .. and if you don’t, then you should.

ONLY ONE SHADOW, GLEBE APRIL 2009:

DUSK:

Dusk from my kitchen window, i love this view and i can stand for ages watching the boats to and fro across the sea and into the harbour.

FENCED IN:

SHOPPING WITH MISS BLURT AND MISS TYSON: